Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Slow Down and Hurry Up

Winter storm advisory here, our 17" will get another 6-9 tonight. I anticipate school being closed tomorrow and my brain is moving a million miles an hour thinking of things to do with the girls. We're trapped out of the basement because of the painters but I think I'm going to bring the bean table out of hiding. Once they tire of that I'm planning on bringing up the kitchen (they've been playing with that a lot lately). It is funny how a toy becomes 1000 times more interesting when it's moved to another room.

My mommy instincts tell me Kate is on the verge of being sick. She hasn't been able to shake her cough, her appetites down and her eye looks a little suspicious to me (pink eye coming on?). Tonight she looked so pale to me, this means I wont sleep well tonight, I'll be getting up to check on her all night long.

It cracks me up how our two girls just will not walk anywhere. Kate runs and Kendall gallops. Even getting into bed tonight, Kendall went over to her closet to hang something on the doorknob and then gallops back to bed. Wouldn't we all look ridiculous if we did that now? I think the next time I get groceries I'm going to gallop down the aisles. When does that stop? One day out of the blue I'll realize that they are walking and it will make me sad. I want to bottle up every little moment because I don't know which one will be it's last, the last time she gallops to bed, the last time she says "bless yous" instead of 'sneezes,' the last time Kate goes to throw her dirty clothes in the hamper before bath time but forgets to take off her socks (hilarious I tell you, she does it almost every single time, do you know how funny it is to see a little two year old streaking through your house with her socks on?!). Here's that word again: balance. I'm having a hard time between not wanting them to get another day older and not being able to wait until they are able to experience all that comes with growing up...that first 2 wheeler bike ride, that first lost tooth, that freedom from driving the first time...). I want both to bottle them up and watch them experience life, I think that is why I work so hard to preserve each memory by either blogging about it or taking a picture or making a scrapbook page about it. So that when they are grown and on their own I can relive these days. No matter how much I strive to enjoy the moment I know that I'll have regrets, don't all moms? I'll wish I hadn't cleaned this or that, wish I hadn't stopped to blog about something but instead just spent that time sniffing their sweet little girl hair smells and stealing their little girl snuggles. You just have to find that balance I guess, that ever elusive balance.

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